The other day we were among a group of friends, getting ready to eat…before praying one of the guys looked around (at the large group of adults and kids) and said, “Is everyone here (from your family)?” Husband and I looked at each other, and answered, “No. We have one missing.”
He looked around for our three kids. Hesitated for a minute, and then gave us an understanding look.
One is missing.
is not here yet.
It is hard to stay focused sometimes on the here and now when one is missing.
I don’t want our kids to every feel glazed over or like we aren’t present because of the hard waiting.
I told Hubby once how hard it is when you have so much love for someone but there aren’t here to give it to.
But there are four, he and them, here right now that I need to love and love well.
Oh, how many times I fail.
Hubby stopped by during the day today and was pleasantly surprised to find me siting on the floor doing puzzles with the youngest.
Why is it a battle for me to be instead of do?
I like to “do”.
I can see what I have accomplished.
Worth wrapped up in what “I” produce.
We had a good discussion at Bible Study about self and how selfish we can be…how we need to hear and follow the lead of that still small voice. To stop and give up “our time” for those sweet lives around us. Laying life down in order to really live.
I have criticized others in the past for being so busy outside their home that they aren’t really present with their kids. But, even though I am not too busy outside, I am too busy inside the home… self-induced busyness…blogging, deal gathering, editing pictures, catching up (all good things, just out of balance with what needs to be the priority, with what I deep down want to be the priorities– time so precious and fleeting; squandering and wasting too much of it).
God is using this weakness to show me how much I need Him.
God is helping me see how quickly I can wander.
I need Him.
I am so glad He is powerful and full or grace. The perfect balance of grace and truth.
Looking forward to hearing Sue Cramer speak tonight on Mary and Martha.
I want to be more like Mary.
To sit at feet.
To listen instead of fix.
To be still.
To be content to linger.
Do you struggle with being a doer- living in a frenzy of tasks, neglecting relationships and always striving to get just one more thing done?
Or do you error on the side of lingering at the neglect of being a good steward of what is before you?
Not trying to condemn, just being honest with my struggles and hoping that we will acknowledge where we are and realize that He loves us unconditionally.
Let’s ask for His help to live a balanced beautiful life under the Sovereign umbrella of His grace, strength and care.
Dear God, Thank You that You know us; when we sit and when we rise…You are intimately acquainted with all our ways (Psalm 139). Thank You for making us, for loving us, for gently teaching us. Thank You for Your forgiveness. Thank You for another moment to start again. To pause, to breathe, to be. Amen.