Dear Daughter:
It’s hard to believe that soon you will be a teen. Thirteen!
I am slowing down to see you, there in your blossoming glory (oh yes, I see you rolling your eyes at this declaration).
Where has the time gone? They warned me about this when you were just a handful of squishy skin with a toothless grin. I try not to gasp out loud at the realization that we only have five more years until you launch from the nest.
You are lovely. A peculiar treasure—trying desperately to fly yet frustrated it’s not yet time to call the shots.
You find yourself hovering in that cocoon space, caught in the middle of where you once were and where you want to be—one foot in girlhood, the other in womanhood.
Your persistence toward independence and resistance toward the full responsibility required to do so, makes it challenging to find your footing in the midst of rocky ground and shifting hormones.
You have waded past the shallows but not yet ready to plunge into the deep.
You are learning to express herself with loud colors and a determined voice. You are a patchwork quilt, not yet finished but well on your way.
I spy the one who made me a Mom, there in the midst of blur and beauty. I smile as I pause and see you, as you are.
You. Bold and eager.
You. Soon to be, butterfly.
You. A prelude. A masterpiece of His handiwork.
Welcome to thirteen, daughter!
It looks like a mixed bag of crazy and confetti falling on you all at once. #thirteen Share on XYou long to be both normal and unique at the same time. You want to blend in with your friends, but not so much that you are ignored.
You test out the waters and splash around, trying to look cool as you figure out where you are exactly in this sea of change. You laugh loud, yell louder and assert yourself in messy ways as you navigate this uneven terrain.
You are embarrassed when I point out the changes taking place as your form shifts. Although you pretend you are thoroughly annoyed when I ask if you have questions…you secretly don’t hate the attention.
You put on your hipster bag, oversized sweatshirt and leggings and head out the door. I call out, reminding you to cover your tush.
My lectures are not appreciated, yet one day you will see the thread of love and stitches of wisdom woven through these words. My expectations are often met with resistance, yet they are laced with belief that you can do great things. My shortcomings and short-fused exasperation are not something I want you to replay, yet they will provide you with plenty of material for therapy or at least the assurance that you don’t have to be flawless to be a woman.
You are persistent. You are smart and beautiful.
As you spread your wings of femininity, may you discover that the vibrant combination of boldness and tenderness is a gift to behold.
Even though we don’t often see eye to eye right now, I won’t stop making eye contact with you. I want you to know my acceptance throughout every stage. My love does not waver even as we fumble through this awkward dance.
I am sorry for all the times I’ll mess things up, for all the misunderstandings, during this clash of hormones as we try to find our groove.
But through it all, know that this part of the process is crucial as we work together to prepare you for flight. It might not feel like it right now, but you are emerging into a rare beauty that will grace this world with both strength and dignity.
I am proud of who you are, not just who you will become. Share on XI love you daughter. Welcome to thirteen!
Love,
Mom
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Helene says
Oh keep talking mom! She does secretly love that attention and she IS listening!
Katie says
Thank you Helene. Hope you’re having a great Spring. 🙂
Tyra says
This is so sweet and filled with such love. I write letters to my children every year on their birthday. And My 1st born turned 13 2 months ago. I also appreciate the HOPE shared here. I am quick to demolish the lie of the enemy that the teen years have to be contentious with my daughter. While some of that is biological, I decree that we will dwell together in unity and our relationship will overflow with love. Cheers to blessed relationships with teens and for them embracing that they are indeed fearfully and wonderfully made.
Katie says
Love the truth bombs here, my friend! You are an inspiration. 🙂
Gretchen Fleming says
You have captured the moment well Katie! It is a beautifully challenging process to watch our children grow and develop into who God has created them to be. Wonderous to behold from the other side as a mom of young adult children now. It only gets better and better Katie:) I can’t describe the moment when your children challenge you with the depth of their own faith and you love who they have become. You become amazed all over again at their “birth” , this time into adulthood as they start bearing fruit from all the seeds you have sown through the grace of Jesus. He is worthy all over again! And again and again…..
Katie says
Thank you for your wise and kind words, Gretchen. Such an encouragement!